Percentages, chasing the dragon and radio silence…. 

So here I am… Back writing another one of my blogs, now normally I tell you guys to pull up a chair. However, tonight you guys might need a comfy sofa as this blog is a long one!

As always, please excuse the spelling and grammar mistakes, I get so annoyed I make them but someone once told me they were part of the charm of my blogs… Who am I to argue?!?!

Some of my loyal social media friends might have noticed that I recently deleted my social media pages, this was a interesting experience for me. Radio silence can actually be very inpowering sometimes. Now, I’m sure you are all very aware of just how active I am on them. I won’t go in to the reasons why I deleted my social media but it was a bit of an experiment….. Did I miss social media? Not as much as I thought I would. I bet you guys are thinking well why am I back on here if I didn’t miss it? Mainly because you guys seem to miss me and my ramblings. That probably seems really big headed, but I really don’t mean it to be…. So let me explain! Whilst my social media was deleted I took Colin jumping and bumped in to a lovely girl, whom I didn’t know from Adam! But she came over and asked if this was the famous Colin. I, of course proudly said yes. She went on to tell me all about how she follows us on social media and that she has just started riding and competing and how we give her confidence to give it ago because of how ‘real’ we are. Very publicly. Warts and all. I was genuinely taken aback.. But it’s not the first time I’ve been told that my social media cheers people up.. The reason I think I cheer people up is because not only am I but also my social media is so real. I mean, am undoubtedly one of the strongest, happiest and independent girls you’ll find. But even though most days I’m so unbelievably happy to be a single, strong, independent woman with Colin as my life partner. Even I on a (very) odd day face the fact that I’m in my mid 30’s, pretty chunky and the chances of any bloke actually wanting to take me out are slim to none. Sometimes I struggle with the feeling that I have achieved so little, other than to be lucky enough to drop on some amazing horses and pony that haven given me incredible experiences. But hey ho……

Anyone that tells you that are happy all the time is lying. Because no one is, that is real life. And that is what makes me laugh so much about social media, it seems to give people the need to show hundreds sometimes thousands of people they don’t even know and have never met just how amazing thier life is. When in reality they probably hate their husband but can’t afford to leave him, their kids annoy the f**k out of them and that £50k 5yr old they bought from that well known pro as the ideal horse to get them to Badminton is a gutless twat xc that won’t go within 200 yards of the water or a ditch.

I have been chasing the dragon of having a exciting, fun, boring, passionate, safe, sad and happy life style for years, I’m sure you are all thinking that it is all a contradiction of terms. But it really isn’t…. I believe life is about percentages and balance. If you aren’t sad sometimes how can you know what it feels like to be genuinely happy? Same with being bored, allowing yourself to be bored means being excited will feel oh so much more special. But and it’s a big but, I have learnt to make sure all the percentages tip in my favour. The good times have to out way the bad. This time of year my life is very boring. Pretty much all work, work and more work but I love my job. So there it is – my life is pretty boring at the moment but I’m happier than I am bored. I keep my life like that.. Always tipping in my favour even if sometimes it might not feel like things are quite going my way.

So remember, how can you appreciate being happy if you aren’t sad occasionally? It’s better to be born lucky than rich, don’t believe everything you read and sometimes silence says more than a thousand words.
Xx

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