So here we are again.. You guys know the drill! Pull up a chair and excuse the bad grammar and spelling!!!!
This blog is a very personal one and if I’m not I am honest I was nervous about publishing it, I am going to share something with you all that very few people know about. But you know me, go big or go home… If I’m going to share a personal secret, why not share it with everyone that reads my blogs and the world of social media?!!!
Recently I have witnessed what I think some people may call ‘cyber bullying’
Now when I say witnessed what I really mean is I have sat back and read many very negative posts about someone by someone else on social media, the whole situation intrigued me. The person that was being targeted never bit back but the need to paint this person in a negative light was pretty alarming. It really got me thinking, what makes a person want to go on social media and call someone out in such a way?? I mean, I’m not saying the person receiving the negative attention is a saint but what makes a grown adult want to sit in front of a screen and vent about someone they have nothing to do with to thousands of people they don’t know.. Odd hey? I had been thinking about it for months, well when I say thinking – I mean it would pop in to my head every now and again.. I just couldn’t see the point of it, why would you want to try and distroy someone so publicly? A couple of nights ago whilst sitting with my mum watching TV she asked what was on my mind (mums know everything!!) So I told her.. I explained in great detail what had happened, been said and the effect I could see it might have on someone not as strong minded as myself. My mum looked at me wisely and I was waiting for her ‘mum knows everything reply’ when she said this……….
Clearly they are stupid and mean, I shouldn’t lose any sleep over trying to work them out. You can’t reason with stupid and you never want to surround yourself with mean people. I came back with how this person must be unhappy, lonely or both.. Mum shots back with, Phoebe – we are all unhappy and lonely at times. Does that mean you take time out of your day to sit in from of a computer and rant about someone that’s actually doing no harm to you, to loads of people that don’t know you from Adam? No it doesn’t. The end.
Mums response got me thinking…
When I was 16 I lost my best friend, he had a heart defect and needed a transplant. Because I wasn’t family I wasn’t allowed to stay with him in hospital, so in my typical ‘you won’t stop me way’ I got a job cleaning there so I could stay close to him. I promised him if he got though the operation I would buy him his beloved Manchester United football shirts. He duly did and when he left critical care and moved on to intensive care off I went with the money I got from selling my first horse and bought his Man U shirts for him. The relief I felt when he left intensive care is like no relief I’ve ever felt before or since. He was making great strides so I went back to doing my horses, the first morning I didn’t clean at the hospital I got a phone call to say he had taken a sudden turn for the worse and died. Still to this day I haven’t got over the fact I let him down… I wasn’t there for him when I should have been.. For that I can never ever forgive myself.. I will never forget him saying to me before his operation that if he didn’t come though it he wanted me to promise to him that I would enjoy my life and to be kind.
It is because of him and his words that I am the loyalist friend you will ever find, I never want to feel the pain of not being there when I should have been ever again, I try my best to be kind and I enjoy myself to fullest whenever possible.
Yesterday I sat in the beautiful sunshine on my most beloved horse and all this ran though my mind…..
Some people think I’m a real loner, but that is far from the truth. I adore my friends, I just don’t have many of them.. I am very much single because I love my life as it is and I have honestly not found someone I think can or wants to add to my life enough to allow them to. No one makes me happier than me, myself and I. If I want to do dinner or to go dancing, I take myself and have met some amazing people whilst out and about on my own. I also have learnt to appreciate the things I don’t have, sometimes you really are better without than with.
Life really is to short to reason with stupid, surround yourself with mean and to not be happy..
Have a great weekend, until next time…….
Enjoy and be kind.